Miss Loi is a full-time private tutor in Singapore specializing in O-Level Maths. Her life's calling is to eradicate the terrifying LMBFH Syndrome off the face of this planet. For over 17 years she has been a savior to countless students ... 
Click to enlarge
Not wishing to sound ego, Miss Loi does occasionally get some fan mails and accolades emerging from the heap of mundane enquiry emails in her inbox. Of course Miss Loi is always glad and flattered whenever she sees these, but sometimes they do tend to get a little out of hand.
So exactly this day last week, she got this (reproduced totally uncut, unabridged and complete with the original typos):
Date: Tue, 28 Aug 2007 10:08:07 +0000
Subject: its hard to see the silver liningIt has always been my lifelong dream to be able to attend your lessons, for my horrendous maths results has always failed me. I know there are limitations to my aptitude, but it is really a lifelong aspiration to be able to do really well in my maths exams. YOU ARE MY ONLY HOPE. My family is currently in dire financial state. My dad is a drunkad, my mum has to work 23 hrs a day, and i have to take up part time jobs. I am sneaking to type this message at this god forsaken illegal factory to earn extra money. PLEASE, give me some a maths papers to salvage me from this fate of mine. If not, i will really consider slithing my wrist.
Miss Loi actually proceeded to check an online dictionary and found that there’s no such word as slith - the closest words being slither and slit.
Discounting the bizarreness of someone actually slithering his wrist like a snake across the table should he not receive Miss Loi’s tutorage, she suddenly woke to the shocking possibility that someone could actually slit his wrist for the same purpose!
After composing herself, Miss Loi replied this person with her usual tuition schedule and urged him to leave a contact or call back. But till now Miss Loi has not heard back from this person with a slithering wrist.
So what do you think? A real emo case (gosh hope not!)? Prank? Or an alien with slithering wrists has actually found this blog?
But Miss Loi does admit to having a liking for a mama drama style of writing.
Comments
Comments Feed
30 Comments
曜
日
I think this student really adores you and wants to attend your classes… hehe…
曜
日
Hmm. if he needs to sneak to type this mail to you it would imply that he either knew about your website long ago, or during the few minutes of idle surfing he got yr blog, and in that exact few minutes he managed to write you a mail.
Wow!
曜
日
paced, think likely this is a prank lah. But it’s nice if this is really an adoring student … WAIT it’s NOT nice if he’s really gonna slit his wrist!
曜
日
Aaron, does Singapore even have a “god forsaken illegal factory” in the first place??? And though it’s god-forsaken, there’s even internet facilities there! LOL
曜
日
wah lao.. he still know cheem words like silver lining.. lol
曜
日
The sliting wrist is NOT nice… I agree…
曜
日
Probably a fakey. But it sure makes for good entertainment though
曜
日
LOL -.- this makes me wanna send u a melodramatic email juxtaposed with pessimism
曜
日
Hah. Very suspicious.
曜
日
hmmm i tink it seems damatic but mayb theres such a person out there which is really an adoring student. From his language can tell that he is quite smart and educated.
曜
日
23hours a day.
Blah. lol
曜
日
HighwayBlogger, yeah these days having a good command of English doesn’t guarantee you a comfortable life … sigh …
曜
日
OMG zain you have a blog! Why didn’t you tell Miss Loi?! Good things must share mah!
曜
日
Kiroii, you’ll first need to find a god-forsaken illegal factory to send your email!
曜
日
BR, you know this person? Your friend?
曜
日
missloi, i would slither my wrist to be in maths class…
if that’s possible
曜
日
BBB, just having a wild thought you might be referring to yourself … or you really do know an alien with slithering wrists!
Quick! Own up!
曜
日
Farinelli, don’t play play. There are plenty of supermoms around okay?
曜
日
xinyun, how nice would it be if we could just wave all our troubles away with just a slither of our wrists? lol
曜
日
all this slithers remind me of HP lor.
and snakesssss…
but seriously, how does one slither his wrist?
曜
日
Pardon but what’s HP? Guess it’s not handphone or Hewlett-Packard?
曜
日
hp = harry potter possibly refering to chamber of secrets
曜
日
i don’t know whether to laugh or cry. but good miss loi replied him. and he didn’t reply you??? how can/?!!!
let’s see how drama the next reply might be!!!
曜
日
Lol, his story is abit too far-fetched to me -.- i mean…23hrs? illegal factory?
But of course lah, if what he said is true then i hope ms loi can stop him frm “slithing his wrist”, ( whateva it is…but it sound bad to me)
曜
日
miss loi, regarding ur question on my blog…
i’m not sure how to answer you.
曜
日
kiroii, oh Harry Potter! Probably Miss Loi’s too old to have thought of that … this is so embarrassing … sigh.
曜
日
Hello my fairieimp godmother.
Given the 23-hour work days and the harsh working conditions of this god-forsaken illegal factory, looks like it’ll be quite awhile before we hear from this person again.
曜
日
123`, how to stop this person if (s)he doesn’t reply? Unless we organize a search for such a factory in Singapore … hmmm this reminds Miss Loi of the recent slavery incidents in China.
曜
日
xinyun, just replied you
曜
日
heh i see
i wouldn’t mind to have an interesting teacher like you, at least you are one tutor who could come up with interesting topics to grab kids’ attention.