Miss Loi’s Temple (aka Joss Sticks Tuition Centre)

And on the plains of Novena did she build a Sanctuary of Learning, to take in and care for those with the poorest of poor grades, so that they may be cleansed of their low confidence & careless mistakes, and attain their Mathematical Salvation.

The sign that greets all weary travelers upon their
arrival at the mythical Temple Gates

They come from all corners of our land. Making their pilgrimage to this One Place to burn collectively the joss sticks that will grant them their ultimate deliverance from the terrifying nightmare that is the Last-Minute Buddha Foot Hugging Syndrome.

The Temple’s Rumoured Locality

Nestled somewhere amongst the lush fertile plains of Novena in Central Singapore a pebble’s throw from the MRT, in a secret location known only to those of the purest hearts, Miss Loi’s Temple offers the ways of the enlightened to the determined masses and helps the willing attain Mathematical Nirvana.

UPDATE: Waymarkers are up! Read this classic post on the Three Signs for more directional information.

The Temple Grounds

Click the photos and read this post for more description on The Temple’s attractions.

Jφss Sticks Sign of the New Temple Gates

Fully-furnished with the essential amenities, this little sanctuary of hope is an epitome of coziness – creating a fully air-conditioned conducive environment that is comfortable for all students but at the same time ensuring that they ~~don’t fall asleep~~ maintain their focus throughout every intensive joss sticks session.

Miss Loi’s Great Hall of Salvation

The Four Chambers of The Temple
( Clockwise from left – φ π Λ δ )
Read this post for more details on each chamber.

To preserve the sanctity of the environs, and to ensure that every single participant receives the maximum amount of legendary teachings and tender loving care from Miss Loi & The Order of The Temple, each joss sticks session at the Temple grounds is limited to a maximum of four to eight students (depending on the room) only.

Amenities include a full library of obligatory TYS, textbooks & workbooks; high-quality graph paper, cute attendance sheets; a 20 ppm super duper printer cum copier to churn out Miss Loi’s Exam Papers to be thrown in as mini-tests at the end of each session; and a DECT phone to call home when yours run out of batteries.

And yes, light snacks are always available and will be served to all devotees weary from their long journeys, together with mini-tests and ~~endless~~ worksheets to enhance their spiritual well-being.

The Dreaded Official Timekeeper for Jφss Sticks Sessions

Some spirit-lifting elements at The Temple
(Clockwise from left) Japanese good luck study charms direct from Miyajima (to ward off evil LMBFH spirits), a jar of tidbits, and a clock to ~~signal the end of class~~ time the speed of students’ workings.

Temple Bookings

As space in her humble Temple is limited relative to the vast numbers of LMBFH Syndrome sufferers out there, advance booking of session slots is ~~definitely encouraged~~ imperative to confirm your early salvation from your spiritual malady.

Please refer often to the Temple Schedule for the latest updated session timetable.

The Final Sign Just Outside Miss Loi's Temple

Join the growing List of the Saved

The United Colors of The Temple.

~~Devotees~~ Students from over 130 schools have passed through The Temple Gates on the way to their Mathematical Nirvana. Can you spot your alma mater, or perhaps contact us to add yours to the growing list below?