2009
Wed
4
Feb
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Introducing The New Temple!

(15)
Posted at 9:57 pm by Miss Loi in Miss Loi's Temple
UPDATE: With the completion of The Great Hall of Salvation, Miss Loi has since moved there.

Hello everyone! Konnichiwa! 欢迎欢迎! Welcome to the tour of The New Temple!

Old Miss Loi
The great-great-great-
great-great-great Grandmother

My name is Miss Loi, the great-great-great-great-great-great granddaughter of The Temple’s founder, and I shall be your tour guide for today.

While we wait for the rest to finish their arduous climb up The 38 Steps To Salvation, here’s some background information on the UNESCO World Heritage site that you’re about to visit.

The Old Temple Gates The Old Temple

Established in 2007 A.D. by my great-great-great-great-great-great grandmother to help students in their mathematics, it has its humble beginnings in a small, little room where we now stand.

You see, lives of Singaporean students were pretty harsh in those days. Crammed into classes of 40 or more in school, all of them had to sit for two major exams, common tests and numerous class tests every year.

*Collective ‘Oooh’ from the tour group*

OK seems like everyone’s here. Let’s start the tour proper shall we?

The New Temple Gates

Jφss Sticks Sign at the New Temple Gates
The Sign of The New Temple Gates

What you’re seeing before you are the legendary NEW Temple Gates, finally unveiled to the internet-at-large in February 2009 A.D. after, according to popular folklore, my great-great-great-great-great-great grandmother took a month to locate a missing ‘k’.

It’s been said that the very sight of them once reduced straight-As students to tears, and caused many to experience a sudden surge in their Mathematical prowess.

At this point, I’d like to ask a quick quiz question: Can anyone tell me what’s the expression for the rth+1 term in the binomial expansion of (a+b)n?

T_{r+1} = (matrix{2}{1}{n r})a^{n-r}b^r! BANZAI!!!!!

Well done Sato-san! *clap clap* It does seem like there’s an element of truth to the legend after all.

The Chamber of Λ

The Tablet of Gratitudes
The Tablet of Gratitudes
The Sign of Λ

As we walk past the Tablet of Gratitudes from which hangs a myriad of homage to my great-great-great-great-great-great grandmother, you’ll see on your left The Chamber of Λ – the first of The Temple’s Four Chambers.

The Chamber of Λ
The Chamber of Λ

Sporting the same Λ symbol on Spartan shields, legend has it that my great-great-great-great-great-great granduncle once used this chamber to shield his A-Level / IB charges from the attacks of the 3D Vectors, amongst other A-Level topics.

With a maximum capacity for 6 students, it holds the record for the longest glass board of all in The Temple, and is also the only chamber where you can find white tables (because the dark ones were sold out by the time we reached Ikea).

The Chamber of δ

The Sign of δ

Continuing down the hallway, you’ll soon see on your right The Chamber of δ.

Oh delta, the Symbol of Change, and the symbol of the cosy little chamber of my little great-great-great-great-great-great grandaunt, where she once held audiences with O Level Science students and where she was rumoured to have conducted her dark alchemic Chemistry and Biology experiments.

The Chamber of δ
The Chamber of δ

With a maximum capacity for 5 students, it holds the record for the smallest glass board in The Temple and, when my little great-great-great-great-great-great grandaunt was not around, it was also the place where errant students who didn’t do their homework got themselves banished to aka 打入冷宫 in the hope that they would {dy}/{dx} their learning attitudes – since this is, after all, The Chamber of Change.

The Chamber of π

The Sign of π

Continuing down to the end of the hallway, we arrive at The Chamber of π.

π – that enigmatic infinitely irrational number which plagued Singaporean students like a leech from their pre-pubescent primary school years all the way to their tertiary years, and despite everything, a number that’s still widely used by dieting women today to compute the circumference of their waists.

The Chamber of π
The Chamber of π

With a maximum capacity for 6 students, this is the sister chamber to the sacred Chamber of φ (which we’ll come to shortly), a mirror-like extension of the latter in times of crisis when The Temple was frequently overrun.

The Chamber of φ

The Sign of φ

And now hold your breath, ladies and gentlemen, for we have come to the innermost quarter of The Temple.

Before you lies The Chamber of φ – the domain of my great-great-great-great-great-great grandmother The High Priestess herself, the Holiest of Holies, the sanctum sanctorum of The Temple, and the main attraction which you have paid your tourist money for.

The Chamber of φ
The Chamber of φ

Oh φ – the Symbol of the Golden Ratio of perfection, and the Mark of the great Jφss Sticks Movement that brought about the demise of the LMBFH Syndrome during the turbulent Tuition Nation era at the turn of the 21st Century A.D.

More Japanese Study Charms
Japanese Study Charms

Lined with good luck study charms from faraway Japan, this was where the High Priestess famously prepared her inner circle of disciples (6 at a time) for the wars against the Great Enemy, and where her ministries were held to cleanse them of their deadly sins of careless mistakes and not leaving enough time in exams to check their answers.

In fact, so powerful was her presence that her spirit is rumoured to be still lingering within the chamber till today …

*Ground trembles*

x = {-b pm sqrt{b^2-4ac}}/{2a}!

Umm … excuse me?

COSINE RULE! a2 = b2 + c2 − 2bc cos A! BANZAI!!!!!

Oh no not again!

我会考甲一!
がんばって! A1!
WE WILL SCORE A1!
WE WILL SCORE A1!
WE WILL SCORE A1!

GRANDMA! STOP IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*silence*

.
.
.

Umm … that’s the end of our tour.

If you’ve enjoyed it, I’d certainly appreciate a small token of appreciation from you at our tip box. We accept all major currencies but please don’t be a cheapskate and tip us in US Dollars.

Once again Thank You / Arigato / 谢谢 for coming and have a very Happy Lunar New Year 2999!

がんばって!!!


2009
Mon
26
Jan
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Probabilities Of A Happy Chinese New Year 2009

(6)
Posted at 11:59 pm by Miss Loi in E-Maths Questions

As the first day of Chinese New Year draws to a close, terrifying news have been coming in from all corners of the land.

Aunty A & Aunty B
The Gossipy Aunty A & Evil Aunty C

With Judgement Day falling before Chinese New Year for the first time in living memory, a second “Judgement Day” took place today, as an entire nation of post O-Level students stood in line to be ruthlessly massacred by gossipy relatives thirsty for the blood of their O Level results, JC/Poly choices, singlehood status, IQ level, height and weight, amongst other things.

Escaping today’s carnage only because her house-visiting starts on the second day of CNY, a particular Student now dreads the prospects of facing her three aunties tomorrow i.e. a Gossipy Aunty who likes to compare her son’s exam results with hers, a Kaypoh Aunty who likes to ask if she has a boyfriend, and a very mean Evil Aunty who always say that she “has put on weight compared to last year”, even though her weighing machine showed exactly the same reading year after year.

Having just broken up with her two-timing boyfriend and still anxious of where she’ll end up on Friday, she really fears that her festive season will be ruined by people whom she only meets once a year.

As such, she wishes to find out her odds of survival tomorrow …

Analyzing the historical data of her past visits, there’s a 33{1/3}% chance of running into Gossipy Aunty A, a 25% chance of running into Kaypoh Aunty B and a 33{1/3}% chance of running into Evil Aunty C in a particular house visit.

  • The *probabilities of Gossipy Aunty A asking about her O Level results, asking which JC/Poly she’s going, and showing-off her son’s results are 1/4, 1/6 and 1/3 respectively.
  • The *probabilities of Kaypoh Aunty B asking about her O Level results, asking which JC/Poly she’s going, and asking if she has a boyfriend are 1/6, 1/12 and 2/3 respectively.
  • The *probabilities of Evil Aunty C asking about her O Level results, asking which JC/Poly she’s going, and pointing out that she has gained weight are 1/12, 1/12 and 5/6 respectively.
*Assume the aunties will only ask the questions described above, or remain silent otherwise.

Given that each aunty only gets the chance to interrogate/scrutinize her once when they meet, and that there’s absolutely no chance of running into more than one aunty during her visit (∵ they hate each other to the core due to some conflict in their past lives), calculate the probability of her

  1. being asked about her O Level results.
  2. being asked about her O Level results or the JC/Poly she’s going.
  3. escaping any questioning/scrutinizing during the visit.

If she has to make a total of three house visits during this Chinese New Year, and that the probabilities are exactly the same as those described above for each visit, find, correct to 3 significant figures, the probability of her

  1. escaping any questioning/scrutinizing in at least two visits.
  2. having a happy Chinese New Year (i.e. avoiding any questioning/scrutinizing on all three visits)

At this point, she realized to her dismay that the carefree months following her O Levels have caused her to generously return all her knowledge of EMaths Probability to her Cher, but she still have a vague memory of her sexy maths tutor saying something to the effort of

For this kind of cheong hei long-winded Probabilty question, it’s important that you draw a Probability Tree Diagram to help you see clearly ALL possible outcomes in the scenario.

Can you help our Student find out if she’s going to have a Happy Chinese New Year tomorrow?

がんばって!!!


2009
Mon
26
Jan
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Happy Lunar New Year!

(5)
Posted at 2:31 am by Miss Loi in Miss Loi the Tutor

It’s that time again when dieting regimes get thrown out of the window and looping Chinese New Year songs reach subliminal levels.

Chinese New Year Fireworks
Fireworks on the northern horizon on the stroke of midnight

And despite a marked reduction in the number of fireworks seen on the northern horizon this year, Miss Loi & everyone at The Temple would like to wish everyone (especially those getting their JAE/JPSAE posting results this Friday)

心想事成!万事如意!
がんばって!!!


2009
Wed
21
Jan
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The Change We Need

(3)
Posted at 11:51 pm by Miss Loi in Miss Loi's Temple

Last night, the world witnessed the historic taking of an oath that pledged a new era.

Barack Obama

Tomorrow, The Temple shall witness the outcome of another oath, that will (hopefully) usher in a new era of peace, silence and tranquility.

The Pledge
Typo: “FOR 12 MINS” should’ve been “WHEN NECESSARY”

YES, THE BOTH OF YOU CAN!

がんばって!!!


2009
Tue
20
Jan
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Miss Loi’s Wheel of Misfortune

(9)
Posted at 10:37 pm by Miss Loi in A-Maths Questions

Now that the euphoria has settled somewhat, it’s time for Miss Loi to catch up on her new year shopping with just a week left to Chinese New Year.

Comprehensively out-muscled and out-jostled by the Ip Man-trained aunties in a packed Chinatown the year before, she decided to do her shopping at somewhere less competitive this time round.

Pasar Malam
Scenes from a pasar malam – courtesy of hot blogger Molemole

And so she found herself shopping tonight at a fun fair cum pasar malam, set in a vast field in the middle of a HDB estate somewhere in the northern part of Singapore – complete with smoky food stalls, tikam-tikam stalls, fun rides, pirated DVDs, and disturbing new year songs that went on for eternity.

Laden with boxes of bak kwa, candy and other new year goodies an hour later, she sat down with a cup of sugar cane juice for a much-needed breather, and to reflect on her tragic failure to win that pinky fluffy soft toy at the tikam-tikam stall.

It was then she spotted the entrance to the huge ferris wheel of the fair, with a large poster touting it as “The Largest Ferris Wheel in the North!”, “Taller Than A HDB Flat!”, and “Visitors will be treated to spectacular views of the northern skyline – including key landmarks like the Causeway and JB‘s magnificent cityscape!”, among other things.

Ferris Wheel
No, not this one

Intrigued by the poster (and the possibility of checking if the Causeway was jammed), Miss Loi quickly gulped down her remaining sugar cane juice, bought a ticket and hopped into an empty carriage.

Surrendering herself to the subliminal effects of the endless new year songs, an oh-so-breathtaking sight unfolded as she soared high into the sky. Rising above the glitzy lights of the HDB neighbourhood and watching the aunties below receding into little dots like those in a dot diagram, she was swept away by stunning views of majestic landmarks like BLK 107, BLK 359, and the multi-storey carpark where she had parked her car.

Just when her carriage reached the top of the wheel, however, the ferris wheel suddenly jerked to a stop and (miracle of miracles) the new year songs actually stopped. She looked down to see the wheel’s operator instructing her to remain in her carriage while he looked for help.

And an obedient Miss Loi did as she was told, and it was then she realized to her dismay that she had left her boxes of bak kwa on the ground before she came on board …

[6 hours later] …

Cold and hungry from the night winds, Miss Loi was awakened by someone calling out to her from a loud hailer:

HELLO! I’M FROM THE FERRIS WHEEL RESCUE TEAM! THERE HAS BEEN A TECHNICAL GLITCH!

He continued …

SORRY WE TOOK SO LONG TO COME AS WE WERE BUSY WITH ANOTHER PROBLEMATIC WHEEL IN THE SOUTH! WE TRIED TO REACH YOU BY A LADDER BUT IT TURNED OUT TO BE TOO SHORT!

-_-

THE ONLY WAY IS TO USE A ROPE TO LOWER YOU TO THE GROUND BUT UNFORTUNATELY, I FAILED MY O-LEVEL MATHS LAST TIME AND NOW I DUNNO HOW TO CALCULATE THE LENGTH OF ROPE REQUIRED!

OH WAIT! YOU’RE THAT FAMOUS MATHS TUTOR FROM THE SUNDAY TIMES! SO YOU MUST HELP ME TO SAVE YOU!

Mustering what was left of her mathematical powers, a weakened Miss Loi could only “see” the following:

Using the ground as the x-axis, the circular ferris wheel is centered at (0, 6). A ladder left lying on the wheel can be described using the equation x + y = 10 and is tangent to the wheel.

If Miss Loi’s carriage is right at the top of the wheel, find the length of rope needed to lower her to the ground.

As she’s beginning to feel the effects of that massive gulp of sugar cane juice, can you please help Miss Loi before she has to do the unthinkable?

*Blogged to you live from Miss Loi’s mobile phone, in a cold, lonely carriage x meters high in the sky … *
NOTE: Unfortunately Miss Loi is too weak this time to give more tips or draw a diagram to illustrate further. So it’s up to you to first visualize the situation and brush up on both your basic and AMaths Geometry.
がんばって!!!